Chapter 5 - The Last Day

Apparently, yesterday was the last day of my UG, I've got only those wretched exams left and then I will be outta those strangely-bathroomly-tiled walls, those dingy, unfriendly classrooms and that crappy excuse for a campus once and for all.

And fittingly, I spent the day bunking classes, wandering outside during class hours and "listening" in class. Went in pretty late thanks to imbecile bro telling me that he needs the bike, 15 mins before I was going to leave, had to rush to get a bus and ended up being 20 mins late to college. Like anybody cares! Boxer (Rape- The man's got THE widest collection of White shirts!) was in class and he waved me in without as much as a glance even though I missed half of the class. He sat around, talking in whispers to his minions in the front rows as I joined Rape and Addy at the last bench. 10 minutes after I parked myself, I realized the effects of my bro taking away the bike! I had promised this friend of mine who was leaving town that I'd see her before she leaves and without the bike, it was gonna be slighta difficult. Rape's lesser known brilliance kicked in and by the end of the hour, I was on addy's bike with a stolen helmet which, oddly, didn't let my glasses fit in!

As I was careful not to cross 50 on the bike, I was wondering what the helmet's owner would be thinking, till a small stone hit me rectangle on the nose, yes, the helmet lacked a Visor. The send-off was shorter than I expected it to be, so I biked back to college, 1/3 of my face layered with dust and what not, while the remaining was stuffed inside the tight helmet, behind layers of black fabric. Rape had escaped and it was Addy and Me in the last row, all alone, trying to move the bench forwards and backwards using nothing but our pinky fingers. We suddenly started reminiscing, about the out-of-place gang of friends, 8 in number, cramped into the last benches from day 1. How we started talking to each other, how we spent countless hours bunking, how we lazed off even more hours at juice shop/bajji kadai, how we lied at home to stay at a friend's place in the night and how Golti J's addiction to beer was disturbing!

Rape A.k.A Rakesh Ramani - Best friend of the lot, partner in graffiti art on table and how can i forget his women-repelling powers? Dumb C Teamie.

Golti J A.k.A Jagan Passapalatte ( I kid you not!) - Clown, Bangalore addict and the child. Dumb C Teamie.

Beer Belly A.k.A Chandramouli P.S - Exaggeratus maximus, aspiring theatre artist and Brand whore!

Maanamkettavan A.k.A Arvind Sairam - The great man who cleared 16 arrears in a single sitting, Clown II, man with strangely addictive hand gimmicks.

Golti A A.k.A Aditya Kouda - Guitarist, the ego guy and the man who's had 3 different hairstyles throughout college!

Barath A.k.A Barath - The guy in the long term relationship, Rich kid and abnormally tempered.

Proxy A.k.A Haribaskar - Proxy man, Good guy while entering college, transformed into more than just a metal head by Golti A.

Srivatsan A.k.A Srivatsan Hari - Nerd, Computer Guy and the dude who earns in $.

I'm gonna miss these guys a lot, the rest, not so much. Had these guys not been there for me, preventing me from turning into one of those stereotypical Vivekananda College Boys, I would've been one huge ass! (Bigger than now)

So thank you men, it was an honour bunking classes and eating food at strange hours with you. There are certain things that are unmentionable here that I am thankful for too, you know what I mean.

But frankly, the only good thing about my college was how they let me participate in all those Culturals all through the 3 years. If not for that, I would've stayed in college more and probably been semi-transformed. I've met tons of people at these culturals and they are a good gang of folks who deserve more than just a mention, will write on them laters. The Cherry on my 3 years of labour was Grandslam '09. I still can't figure out how we managed to conduct a small but cash-rich culturals in just 12 days! True Story!! Thanks to every one of those volunteers, fellow organisers and just everybody who were a part of it, you just gave some purpose to the 3 years that I spent in the rotten hell hole.

If I've not killed myself by now, you know it's because of those fellow last benchers. I've received nothing from the college, absolutely nothing. Insipid professors who scold me in front of a packed crowd for not creating a scene, the folks from the other depts who were banging their heads trying to figure out stuff that are beyond their comprehension, those 4 fat guys who spent every single day inside the BBA dept looking at MTV Roadies on the free internet with the HOD sitting next to them asking them to click on the girl's face!

I am definitely going to miss my last bench mates and I'm hoping I can say the same things, if not better, about the next set of people I am going to meet in my life's next chapter. Which may be either a Year at a Mass Communication college outside city or 3 years at Ford.

I raise a toast, to my co-conspirators, for good times gentlemen, good times... You've made these 3 years less of a struggle..