The Basic Instinct

Watch a movie. Get a call. Pause. 15 minutes later. Play. 20 odd mins later. Message. Pause. Smile. Reply. Play. Feel hungry. Feel lazy. Pause. Rue about having to get up. Go to the next room. Search for room mate's corn flakes box. Go back to the comfortable bed. Earphones in. Play, eat. Munch. Increase volume. Munch.

Get bored of corn flakes. Close box. Appreciate a scene. Smile. Eat boring corn flakes again. Back of the mind thought, to be scolded by room mate for finishing his corn flakes. Smile. Realise it'll be two whole weeks till he returns. Pause. Nature's call. Get up. Break that fallen corn flake into numerous pieces. Pick each and every small piece and eat. Grin. Realise you have to pee. Go. Come back. Eat the missed out pieces. Play.

Think about the day that was. Lost in thoughts, lost in time. Smile. Realise that movie is still playing. Don't bother to rewind.

Pause. Double Click. Open Notepad. Write this out. Smile. Ctrl+S. Choose. OK. Alt Space C. Double click. Play.

A tea cup is only so deep..

Procrastination's a bitch. It's not like I've been hell busy in this past week. I've been working, but not so much to leave me time starved to blog.

There were so many things I wanted to blog about:

Addiction

Being smitten

Rediscovery of The Beatles

Nostalgia

New movies

Stanley Kubrick's brilliance yet again

New found love for theoretical thermodynamics

Concerns about BCCI's sanity

New rules in Formula One

But of course, the tight lipped dirty diseased bitch called Procrastination rises up all over again and it is increasingly annoying to know that I actually like Procrastinating.

In want of a little perspiration..

Winters are crazy here in Delhi. One drop of sweat! That's all I'm asking for. For a Madras guy, sweat is second nature. We need to sweat a bit, whichever month of the year it is. And I haven't perspired in more than a month!!

And to all those people sitting in Madras and going "no, we hate sweating" and all that blah.. Come spend a month in temperatures between 8 and 13 and you'll know what I am talking about. The thought of having to roam around in your home with multiple layers of clothes is blasphemous. Worst of all, having to wait for the water to heat up using that god darned immersion rod is torturous. But then again, the warmth that you feel when you tent yourself under that thick kambli (blanket) of yours is worth it.

That alarm clock (over the ages, people have scolded the alarm clock using choice words, but this is, for every practical purpose, indispensable) goes mad and you'll HAVE to get out of that warm cocoon of yours to take bath and then go to college in God Ugly buses. The buses in Delhi are of two types. The pathetic ones and the proper ones. The Pathetic ones are just plain pathetic, you never know if that prick from the seat is a loose spring or a shard from a beer bottle. The proper ones, like the A/C buses in Madras are extremely over-crowded (thereby negating the proper adjective) and they barely stop at the places they should. This is the state of public transport in the Capital, which by the way, is hosting the Commonwealth Games.

After taking the Metro (which is awesome, except for the combined cost of ticket and rickshaw to reach college being higher than taking the bus to college and back), I switched to the bus. Now, I really don't mind the cold. I am seriously considering getting a cycle. It'll be a good workout and I honestly don't mind the 10km distance, the cold will help me get through it. With a little bit of luck, I might sweat a bit too!! :D

Gahness! You care?!

Intention is a funny thing, it is probably one of those few things that acts as an obstacle to itself. But if there's a bright spot to this whole twisted thing, it is that Intention is a start, a start towards something better or worse, a start nevertheless.

It is weird how random people on the road can make you smile. You're standing outside a tea shop, sipping on hot tea on a cold evening and the dhoti clad old man with a stick can make you smile. The happiness on his face, despite his age, despite his inability to walk for one kilometer continuously, is impossible to miss.

For the millionth time in my sorrow filled life, I am feeling lonely. I've been lucky to make some wonderful friends here, despite my weird habits and quirks, they think I am Normal! Yet, there are times when I am in my room, my room mate's blabbering away to glory about his marketing classes, and I zone out. I blank out and feel how freaking lonely I am this world. I've written this before, but the worst kind of loneliness in the world is the feeling of being lonely even when you are surrounded by lovely people around you. Strange, the difference between lovely and lonely is just an alphabet. Gah, I sound like some 17th century wanna be poet!

And being silly and the boy with his tongue doesn't help. Not at all..

Whatever the hell does this mean?!

I once had a dream (a week or so ago). Like everybody. When I was asleep (that happens rarely, so it IS a big deal). I've been trying to comprehend this till now and I fail to see beyond the obvious.

I was walking down the road leading from the market to my place here in Delhi. On the way, I bought a recharge card, used the ATM and paid some random bills. I took a right turn and there was sudden darkness. No lights, nothing. I trip and I fall down and I start rolling down like I'm coming down some hill. I tell myself that this is a dream and I tell myself to wake up. I do wake up, I smile a bit and I pull off the blanket from my face. The ceiling looks different. I am back home in Madras.

I come out of the room to find my whole family, including my brother (this is where it gets crazy, Mahesh is in South Carolina,U.S.A doing his M.S), watching TV. They don't think it's a big deal that I am there. I try to distract them asking when I came there and how I got there from Delhi. My kitten licks my toes and I smile at it. They tell me I've been there for a week. I try and tell them that it's impossible, as I didn't make any trip, and that it's even more weird for Mahesh to be there. I try and drink some water.

I suddenly wake up to find myself back in my room in Delhi!

My Jogging Pangs

I tried Jogging a day ago, early in the morning of course, BAD Mistake. All I was wearing was my German Football club Tee, shorts and shoes. Truth be told, parts of my body that haven't ever gone cold froze away. I did a round around my block, around one kilometer and the last 200 or so metres, I sprinted just to get back home, and the moment I did, I didn't care to remove my shoes, just lied down and covered myself with my blanket and didn't wake up for the next hour.

But that was yesterday.

This morning when the alarm went off blaring away to glory, I woke up, shut it and realisation dawned. I had NO motivation whatsoever. I am not fat, I need to put on weight actually. There are no marathons coming up. There's no girl pushing me to get toned. Even though I want to, I am not in Karate classes anymore, so no one to tell me that my calves are as weak as a stick of butter.

My only solace is that I love running. But that isn't enough to wake me up at 6 am in this bloody cold and jog.

So, if anyone of you can think up of something that'll keep my going, something that'll push me into Jogging mode, I'd be more than welcome. Pseudo reasons just to help me are appreciated too, but don't be like me, be Subtle.

Formula 1 season, a round up.

Well, the Formula 1 season's all but ended. Ross Brawn has proved that he's pretty good at what he does. Button's finally got what he deserved, Kudos to him. Massa had an accident. Is he Jinxed?! Hamilton's championship goes down the drain. Michael Schumacher didn't make the comeback, extremely disappointed with that. Force India's dramatic and rather short lived showing, let's wait and see what they have to offer in '10. FIA shows its might to the Renault team. A team fixes a race, literally asks one of its drivers to crash in order to let the other win. Incredible guts!!

This season was bad for a tifosi. It was hard to see Ferrari going down like this, barely fighting. The main problem with Ferrari is that they've never been able to make a strong come back, a strong enough come back to challenge the leaders. This happened in 2006 too. Renault got off to an awesome start to the season, MSC had bad luck. By the time it started turning around, it was too late to win, even for the dream team of Michael Schumacher, Ross Brawn and Jean Todt.

Transfers:

Biggest one of all. Alonso moves to Ferrari. I DO NOT like this transfer one bit. It's like Tiger Woods joining the European team, it's like Federer playing for Spain in the Davis Cup.

Alonso is an excellent driver, there's no doubt in that. He's won Two World Championships and if that isn't proof enough, he won it when Michael Schumacher and Ferrari were at their best. He then moved to a bigger team, McLaren and everybody knows the deal with Hamilton and Alonso. Two big ego filled balloons fighting for the title is good for the sport, but inside a team, there have to be some compromises. Raikonnen and Massa are both awesome drivers and they have both driven for Ferrai for the past Three years, ever heard of any issues between them?! I just can't imagine what's going to happen between Massa and Alonso next year. I just hope Ferrari can make Alonso a better driver, both in technique and as a team man.

Raikonnen, a shocker. He says he might not race next year! The guy's an awesome driver. I've had some issues with him when he was fighting Schumi, but hey, I have that for anyone and everyone who challenges MSC, except probably Hakinnen, who was as brilliant as MSC. I really hope Kimi gets a contract, the sport can't lose a good driver like him, not when the pillars of the sport are in question.

Kubica moves to Renault to fill up Alonso's spot. I don't know if it is just Steve Slater, but he's been built up way too much. He's got the occasional podium, but to say that he's a competitor for the title, that's just pushing it.

One more small hope is Karun Chandok gaining a seat in Force India. I know this is more than just a hope, but then, Mallya's said that if Chandok's good enough, he'll give him the spot. Chandok's an awesome commentator (listen to his commentary in the Brazil GP'08), but as a driver, I don't know.

Rules:

The only change in the rules that I know of is the ban of Refuelling during the Pits. This is beyond my imagination. There is going to be immense pressure on the pit crew to be quickER, like anyone else can change 4 tyres, fuel a car with around 200 kgs of petrol and get it back in perfect running condition in less than 8 seconds. Well, one thing's for sure. There will not be anymore events of drivers driving away with the fuel rigs still attached to the car.

Here's wishing luck to all of them for the next season.

To do the do..

I don't really know what is going on and I do NOT, I repeat I do NOT know what part I am playing in this. Sometimes I even doubt if I am part of It. the terms express train and clutching on to of dear life comes to mind.

It is difficult to do nothing because you never know when you're done.

And things aren't made any better, or any worse for that matter, by this certain feeling towards this certain girl. But one thing’s for sure, the fact that I am again being this dumb asshole who doesn't do anything about it, that definitely makes things worse. Why am I always the first person to comment on stuff, but not proactive when It comes to women? What Is It that stops me? Fear of being turned down? That could be a reason seeing how frequent that happens. Or is it the fear of being accepted? That could be a reason, seeing how the only girl I truly ever loved said just three words when I poured myself out to her - after some external coaxing by some unintentional parties - bad timing dude. Most of the times, I wonder all the action Is even worth all this!

No seriously, it’s happened a thousand times before and it’ll happen a thousand times more. Why is this one time so darn difficult? Is it any different you ask me, and I say I don't know? There’s a start!

There’s something else running in the background.

And time, goes by, so slowly... Time has a weird way of doing things. Very weird. Do do do...

I am the dodo... I am the smitten freakin' dodo..

Forward Ho!

Life is fast right now. I wake up each day and by the time I crash down again, all is a blur. I still can't digest that it has been two whole months since I boarded that Train from the smelly Chennai Central, since I spent that journey in the train arguing with those strangers and TWO months has passed since I spent my first weekend in Delhi at my cousin's place playing with her six month old (The baby's forgotten me to be frank).

On a different note, IIT Delhi's culturals is starting this week and I am hoping I can make it to the JAM there. It's been ages since I've JAMmed and after hearing about IIT Mumbai's pathetic JAM standards, I am having mixed thoughts about this JAM in particular.

I'm having holidays from this weekend, for around 10 days and I am not going back to Chennai. Don't ask me why. I am not home sick. Of course I would love to go back home, back to the lovely beach, the events and the friends there. But hey, it isn't a big deal. The beach is going be there forever. I might take a trip to some place near Delhi with my room mate. A simple back packing trip, just us two guys. If that doesn't happen, I might stay home and play Sims 3 for long hours, if I finish downloading it by tomorrow.

Fast events. Disappointments. Depression. Hunger. Financial crunch. Trip cancellation. Girl(s) wooing. Whoosh. Smack in the Face. Fitness freak phase.

A Sunny Day..

Every morning, after handling the pathetic shit jokes from my room mate, I come to college and an annoying old man forces his views on all of us.

No offence, but I respect old people. But this man is an exception. He's this old school bhaaskar who doesn't want to change AT ALL! He imposes his old school traditional rules on us and expects us not to concur. The main problem is that his way of thinking Suck.

We essentially are a bunch of writers and by we, I refer to those who actually want to write in my class. When the old man tells us that we are to stick to a specific way, the whole aspect of Creativity is thrown out of the window and it lands in such a deep muck that it is unrecoverable. The old wheezer makes it a point to piss us off early in the morning and expects us to write "Paper worthy writings" all through the day!

I can go on about him but hey, I am simply voicing out the majority opinion I guess. There were numerous assignments that were actually interesting, like documenting the whole of the 20th Century, analysing global newspapers etc and the bloody old man somehow squeezes out all the fun from it. He says all this crap and doesn't leave the room until he's sure that we're already hating the project.

The biggest irony is that I was there in our lab and this man was telling someone "Everybody should know when to stop working. Retirement is inevitable" and I had this :O thing going on. This, from a 70 odd man who still can't stop treating the students the way it used to be done ages ago!

These kinda people never EVER learn..

Of people and travel

I take the Metro every morning to college and back home after college and I love observing people.

People do very interesting things when they are alone. Some look at women like they've never done before. Some head bang and go into Air Guitaring and Air Drumming at the drop of a hat. And yet, there are others who observe the others (yours truly including).

Then there's this quintessential Kaboor fellow who gets a call and the whole train looks at him, for his phone has the loudest ringtone and he doesn't know how to answer the call. Then there is this Punjabi guy, along with a couple of his cronies, who plays the 'best' of Bhangra mixed with hip-hop for the benefit of the whole train. There's this odd Tamil mama who's voice actually overshadows the voice of the PA system.

And yet, by default, I switch off my player soon as I enter the metro train and start listening and observing people. The other day there was this French couple who were standing right next to me and jabbering in jet speed in French. I managed to catch hold of a certain word, and with my ultimately filtered knowledge of French, recognized that word a full 20 seconds later. I asked them if they were French, in French btw, and made them smile like crazy for some reason. After 2 sentences from me, they switched to English out of compulsion and passion for their language.

I am madly waiting for a cricket match to happen and India to lose. Honest to God, the electric train in Chennai is the best place to be after a cricket match. The discussions and the analysis they make are out of this world. The mamas and the mamis, both in all their wisdom, discuss the match with such fervor and elaborately describe Sachin's cover drive to that one pitiable person who missed the match due to a power cut.

I am loving college so far and I really hope this initial sheen carries on.

The Highs and Wows of Delhi

Yes, atleast for the next few posts it'll be all about Delhi, that is until I get bored of it.

Delhi so far has been pretty interesting. The people, the city and the food have been over-whelming to say the least. The sights need a different mention on its own. Every morning, I take the Metro from my place to Chandni Chowk and then take a rickshaw from outside the station to my college. Right outside a Gurudwara over there (its apparently a pretty popular one!), there's this long (read, very long) line of beggars and not so well off people squatting on the side of the road forming a line of atleast one hundred strong. They are there, dependent on a Sardar and his family to feed them.

I kid you not. A Sardar family comprising of an old man, an old woman, a young girl and another young boy come there every morning (I've been taking that route for the past 3 weeks, so it really is a regular event) in a tempo truck loaded with Chappathis and Sabji and actually feed these people. Imagine the amount of patience, money and respect they have. They feed close to a hundred people, EVERY morning! The simple thought that a hundred people are dependent on you for their breakfast (probably the one proper meal they eat everyday) can stump anybody. Its probably a religious sentiment for the Sardars or something, but this act of unbelievable kindness can wake up anybody and make them feel sorry for living in this world.

And this sight actually makes me feel sad. Sometimes, I'm just unable to look at that long line of people waiting for their food and I look away, pretending to ignore the sight, but my heart aches and it is indeed a pity that I have to watch that every single morning. But then again, just to prove that there is indeed a concept of Balance in this Universe, soon as the Rickshaw passes by these people and takes a right turn at the signal, The Majestic Red Fort welcomes me with all its Pride and Glory.

If there's one thing I am thankful for, it is this sight every morning. The Red Fort is a stupendous sight early in the morning with the sun shining brightly right above it. The sheer history behind it, the volume of importance it holds for us Indians (if you didn't know, Shah Jahan built the Red Fort and the Jama Masjid and developed the city of Indraprastha around it, which later gave birth to Delhi as we know it now) boggles my mind. I can only say that I am blessed to watch this majestic building every morning.

Delhi so far has been a contrast of sorts for me. My class consists of people from varied backgrounds and a simple one on one conversation can tell you that. That is one of the things I like about my class, the variation and the opportunity to learn about different cultures and lands humbles me. There's this omni-present group of Bongs (Who have ears sharper than Cats!) ready to pounce and mutilate anyone who even as much as mention Calcutta in a bad light, this group of Delhites, this guy/girl who somehow seems to mingle with everybody and this quiet guy/girl, who chooses to sit back and enjoy the view. Good Times.

The Feel of Delhi..

Out of 34 people in my class, there are 5 boys!

That sums up my experience in Delhi so far. It's been a complete turn around for me from what I've gone through in Chennai on almost every count. The women are friendlier (yay! :D), the food is, much to my surprise, pretty awesome, the weather is decent and best of all, the Metro Rocks!!

But what's taken a serious beating is my name as Vetti. I no longer stay up late and watch movies and things, mainly because I don't have net in my room. I barely get any time during the day as college takes up most of it. My college works from 9 30 to 4 and since it's a bit far away from where I leave, I have to leave at around 815 to make it in time. It doesn't really end at 4, that's just eye wash, it usually goes on till around 5 and since I get so many assignments which require some research from the net, I stay back till around 7 or so to exploit the free wi-fi and meet my room mate in our regular dhaba near my room for dinner around 8.

I live in this area called Model Town, which is far away from where the students of Delhi usually live, but I find it to be a good place. Cross the road from my room and I get everything, from a Beer Shop (which works for my roomie's advantage) to Mc D's to road side Dhabas to a UCB showroom to a multitude of ATMs.

College, for a change, is awesome to say the least. My Classmates are all equally smart and everybody, again very unusually, has a penchant for the course!There's the whole of India here, with representations ranging from Kashmir to Manipur to Rajasthan to Bihar and TN (yours truly) and obviously the standard Mallu and the usual Punjabi.

The room I live in is awesome. I am staying with one of my college mates, fellow back bencher and partner in bunking, Mr. Beer Belly, so the whole trusting the room mate with your undies and deo isn't an issue. We've got a toilet and a kitchen (which we use to store our suitcases and our footwear) and a small terrace to ourselves.

So far, it's awesome out here. That's the only word I can think of. People back home warned me about bias against southies and all that but so far, I've experienced nothing of that sort. People in my college are educated and they know better. I get off with my crappy hindi at the Dhaba and with Rickshaw dudes.

I only hope I can say the same things about Delhi at the end of my stay here.

He's leaving home after living alone for So many years..

I spent the whole day trying to come up with a smart and witty title for this post and where else to look for than The Beatles? :D

Indeed, I am leaving Chennai tonight, the train's in a couple of hours and here I am sitting in my towel after my last shower for the next 2 days. It feels wierd, knowing that I'm not gonna do some of the things I do pretty regularly for some time.

I don't have butterflies, moths or caterpillars of any sort in my stomach. I am excited and totally looking forward to the whole experience. There have been some harsh realities thrown my way over the last 2 days and I take them as a learning experience.

To all those I wasn't able to meet or talk to before I leave, I am the sorryness. I've had an awesome time thanks to all you people, each and every time I've hung out with you. And I am sorry for all those hurtful things I've said, they were just a spur of the moment thing.

Anyways, my dad's screaming both his lungs out and I gotta go.

My Current Top 5

Vettiness is my middle name. Yes, say what you may, I am ever Lord Vetti. And what better way to relieve myself than listen to some music. I've been slowly making head way into clearing the backlog of songs that I haven't listened to even once and here are my current Top 5:

5. Divinity was born between Blue Wings - Ossein (12.31)

A lesser known american band, people somehow seem to like confusing this band with Opeth!
This song is Totally Psychedellic. Amazingly long instrumental works with just a few lines thrown in. This song totally works for me because of the occasional screams and the trippy feel the song provides.

"...Stride the invertebrates road
Inferiority drifts through your veins
The sunwheel pivots
And your sillhouette is forgotten

Advocate your eyes, Closed
Resperate your mouth, Shut..."

4. Dandelion - Audioslave (4.29)

Its pretty sad that Audioslave churned out just 3 albums. Even though people criticized that their 'sound' resembled RATM a lot, they made sure that they shed that and came up with some amazing songs with beautiful riffs.
'Dandelion' might not have thought provoking lyrics, but the powerful vocals and the addictive opening riff is enough to put this into my list.

3. Have you ever seen the Rain? - CCR (2.41)

Well, which Rock Addict wouldn't be a fan of CCR? This extremely short song has the usually wonderful vocals that you can associate with CCR. An addictive chorus and a flowing melody satisfies me. Infact, the title lines actually haunt me and my brother's heard enough to order a gun to shoot me the next time I sing this out loud.

2. Paranoid Android - Radiohead (6.23)

Yes, I hate Coldplay, I find them to be repetetive, kill me! I prefer Radiohead. They are all that I'd associate with a band that consists of people who've grown up listening to those classical British Rock Bands. Just listen to songs like "Creep", "Fake Plastic Trees" and "Airbag" and you can see where they get their inspirations from. They are how I'd imagine a properly successful 1970s Rock Band would sound like had they continued making music.

'Paranoid Android' has some unbelievably brilliant vocals and the guitar solos are awesome enough to put the song on the 100 Greatest Guitar Solos! I wikied this song and the song structure is apparently pretty unique. Its amazing how much you can learn about a song by simply reading about it in an Open Forum. After I read that, it became pretty obvious that the song sounds like 3 different songs crammed together with brilliant guitar solos uniting them.

1. Sometimes I feel like Screamin' - Deep Purple (7.31)

*Bows Down* Deep Purple is Brilliant, Period.
Though this is one of their more recent songs, It is infact the same Ian Gillian who sang the impossible "Sweet Child In Time" singing this song too.

A totally addictive, haunting and chillingly beautiful riff holds this song together from the start. This song does not have great lyrics but the resonating guitar work and the singing completely makes up for it. This might even make it to my list of All Time Favourite songs!!

When do they transform?

This is not the first day I have been woken up by my angry shouting Dad. I'm sure every one of us, irrespective of what we do and who we are, have gone through that agonosing feeling of being woken up by an angry, grumpy man.

Don't get me wrong, I love my Dad. I strongly believe that there are fewer people who can be more helpful than he is, but there's also the Grumpy side to him. The side that translates every little thing into a loud and annoying scolding session.

Not just my dad, I'm sure almost all dads fit that description. But what is it that transforms a youngster, happily married (if that's even possible) into that ugh-I-can't-stand-in-a-room-with-this-man kinda person? Onset of kids? Rough day at work? Bad cooking by wife? Or is it some reason that my mind can not fathom?

Whatever said and done, I really hope people don't lose their temper at the drop of a hat and for once, just imagine how they'd like to be on the receiving end. When decibels rise, it only causes stress, not only to the person, but also to that harmless cat sleeping away in the corner.

Is it True?

Indeed. The Madras University somehow see it fit to pass me in all of them final semester exams and hence, yours truly is now a Graduate!

Karthik Krishnan H B Com (Corporate Secretaryship)

Boy, that's a lot of characters!

And is this a big deal? In this mad mad world of valueless Under Graduate Degrees, I guess not. To me? Yes, I am sane enough after 3 years in that Unimaginable place and I can slighta see where I am headed in the future.

PS: Yes, Ego trip mood, so I am boasting. I got admits from ALL the colleges I applied to! Times School of Journalism, Delhi; Manorama School of Journalism, Kottayam and our very own Asian College of Journalism, Chennai. I'm heading to Times, the farthest from home! :D

Bleh di doo, Blah di da..

Been a long time since I wrote anything here. Well, not much has been going on as such, lazed vacation. I spend nights trying to watch a movie, but I end up watching Boston Legal or The Simpsons, sleep late -early morning I should say- wake up late, spend mornings strategically planning computer time so that Bro doesn't see through the plan to hog it, evenings contemplating if I should ride all alone till Besant Nagar for Badminton or sit at home and watch, well, Boston Legal or The Simpsons and the cycle repeats.

I really thought once the holidays started, I could watch all those movies I missed and listen to all that held up music in my system, but then you know how it goes when it comes to plans and me! I somehow can not work them out, even when I meticulously plan them sitting on the pot. There have been other things I've planned to do, like make calls for accommodation in Delhi, return that one month due DVD to the store, check out suitcases and similar things and obviously I've not done any of them. It's slighta bummy that I am not doing the things I should be.

I've got only a month in Chennai! :( I'm off to Delhi for my Journalism Course on the 15th of July. As usual, there are the people who ask for goodbye treats and there are people who actually deserve them (*hint hint* Recession!) I'm not gonna bore you with the usual 'oh, i will miss this city, i will miss my friends' and things. Madras is my home and the fact that I know I'll be back in less than 2 years is a decent enough solace.

I am officially blahed out.

Divinity was Born Between the Blue Wings

The day started with the morning at around 8, rather than the usual Afternoon because my sister wanted me to get her something from a shop nearby (Yes, this Always happens to me!) and after I got back home, somehow I decided not to go back to bed. Well, 2 hours later, I was harmlessly playing RCT II on my system when I got this call:

X: Is this Karthik Krishnan of Chennai?
Me: Erm, yes.
X: Karthik, I am calling from Times School of Journalism, Our course Director wants to conduct a telephonic interview right now, are you ready?
Me: Erm, yes. (What else was I supposed to say?!)

. . .

After 20 Mins of discussing things ranging from Politics in Tamil Nadu to Arthur.C.Clarke, mildly touching on whether I am also from the same part of Kerala as him (these Mallus I tell ya!), the Course Director, some Verghese dude, says this- "Congratulations Karthik, You have been accepted into this year's course. You will receive a postal confirmation with other details in some time."

I curtly said Thank You and got back to my game. It took a whole quarter of an hour for the news to actually sink in! Too many thoughts in my head - "I am getting outta home. Is it really THAT easy? Why didn't they conduct a test? Was that a prank? I am getting outta home! One WHOLE year!! Did I cut the call?"

It happened intermittently, I was still not sure if it was indeed a prank, so I checked the number from which I got the call and it looked like a genuine Delhi number. Some Googling later, I found out that it was indeed the number from the Dean's Office. Again, I was somehow resisting shouting at the top of my voice, shouting with joy, mind you.

But it didn't COMPLETELY sink in until I sat on my epiphany pot (my kuckoos!). I actually spent half an hour, singing songs at the top of my voice and feeling genuinely happy. This is what I've wanted since I started the final year in college, to get outta home, I thought I'd write CAT and go off somewhere, but somehow that didn't work out. So I gave Journalism a shot and here I am!

As if I wasn't delirious enough already, a letter from Manorama School of Journalism came in the afternoon post saying these exact lines : "You are ranked 9th in the recently conducted test.. blah di blah.. Your interview is set on the 1st of July, the course begins on 6th July, given your high ranking in the test, we suggest that you come for the interview with your baggage and enroll yourself in the hostel"!!!!

But honestly, is it really that easy to get into one of the Top Journalistic schools in India (TSJ's run by The Times of India and Manorama's run by that Malayalam Manorama Group)? I mean, I am a B.Com Graduate (Hopefully!) who has had completely nothing to do with Journalism Ever, except for a few articles about the things I've been involved in. I've never had any of my writings published, I've never worked for a journalist, heck I haven't worked at all! Aren't there those people who did their UG in Journalism? I really didn't think I would even get one call, but now I am spoilt for choices!! :D

But I am not complaining, as long as I get to spend a year away from home, all alone, living by myself and learning things I had no idea about, I am fine.
Finally, the Big Man up there has acknowledged my existence! :P

PS Don't ask me why I've used that title, that song's my current addiction.

The Insatiable thirst of Mr.Murphy

This is a story of how Mr. Murphy screwed with me on the last day of my student hood.

I went to sleep the previous night planning that I should wake up by around 7, head to the Post Office to send a post by around 9, then leave to college for my last exam starting at 10. It all started well, with the alarm waking me up successfully and me completing my morning ablutions well in time. Just as I was about to save some last minute notes into my phone's drafts, my phone blinked saying "low battery". Strike One. It took me a full 20 minutes to charge up the phone so as to type enough of it and save it all into another phone, leaving my phone to charge. The time - 9.10

I rushed to the Post Office and in the hurry, forgot a document that was part of the post. Being the brilliant genius that I am, I had already sealed the envelope. Strike two. I got back home from the post office, reopened the envelope, put in that document and re-sealed it. The time - 9.25

For the second time that morning, I rushed to the post office and this time, there were 2 people in the queue in front of me and as it would happen only to me, they were ridiculously old. After what seemed like an eternity, my turn came and I finished the posting part. Soon as I got back to the parking lot and kept my leg on the kicker, a certain compartment of my bag flashed in front of me. The Hall Ticket, which was supposed to be in that particular compartment, was not there. (The reason being that while I was returning back home after my previous exam, a generous black crow decided to drop the remaining of its morning breakfast onto my blue bag. It pooped on my bag. So I had to empty all the contents of my bag to clean it and in that confusion, I had misplaced my Hall Ticket!) Strike three. The time - 9.40

I figured it'd be too late to go back home, search for the hall ticket and then rush back to college before 10.30 (The time by which I Must start the exam), so I ended up rushing to college in morning traffic, almost crashing into a gleaming black Honda City. Soon as I reached, I cried out my plea to my one class mate who was as late as me and this passing by stranger told me what to do in order to get the permission to write the exam. I had to go to the controller of exams and write a letter and things. I did and apparently, I needed any one of my professors to sign my letter, validating that I was indeed a student there. As it would happen, all of my professors were invigilating in separate rooms and I did Not have the time to go explain my position to them and get their signature. Strike Four. The time - 10.15

I think Murphy thought he had enough fun with me for one morning, so he just let my 1st semester's English professor walk past me. I managed to convince him that I was an irresponsible oaf to have forgotten my hall ticket and that it wouldn't happen again (It couldn't have, unless I managed to keep an arrear, as that was my last exam) and finally got the required signature. 8 Minutes later, I had my bogus hall ticket in my hand and I was drenched in sweat. All this for a bloody HRM exam! :|

While I was climbing up the stairs to my exam hall, I couldn't help but wonder, the extremes Mr. Murphy goes to screw with someone as innocuous as me!

Where is my woman?

"A Different kind of Poverty now upsets me so
Night after sleepless night, I walk the floor and want to know
Why am I so Alone?
Where is my woman?
Can I bring her home?
Have I driven her away?
Is she gone?"

4+20
CSNY

Running around in Circles...

There are times when I wonder What exactly is it that I am doing.

Here's the Problem. I need people to survive. It is the conversations I have with them that keeps me sane and calm enough to live. Goofy, serious, philosophical, twisty, perverted, funny, mokkaish, depressing, bitching, pick me up sorts, whining, listening.. Every conversation that I have, however random, however short, definitely holds meaning to me. I cherish them and I look back at them at the slightest of the opportunities.

There are times when I wonder Why exactly is it that I am doing what I am doing.

I lie down and I listen to music. There are some songs that catch my attention effortlessly, while there are others that just pass by my ears. But then, there are those special songs that Make me listen to it, the lyrics, the instruments, the layers of music. There are times when I lose myself in the most familiar of tracks, discovering a new instrument being played at the background that adds SO much more meaning to the song!

There are times when I wonder How exaclty is it that I am doing what I am doing.

Some things were extremely hard to do when I was young. Why is it that some of them are hard even now? Have I not grown in confidence? Was I stupid enough to take on those things that early that they've left a permanent scar on me? How do I overcome this? Should I overcome this? Am I happy not actually doing them? Am I afraid of facing failure? Am I too idiotic for success?

Chapter 5 - The Last Day

Apparently, yesterday was the last day of my UG, I've got only those wretched exams left and then I will be outta those strangely-bathroomly-tiled walls, those dingy, unfriendly classrooms and that crappy excuse for a campus once and for all.

And fittingly, I spent the day bunking classes, wandering outside during class hours and "listening" in class. Went in pretty late thanks to imbecile bro telling me that he needs the bike, 15 mins before I was going to leave, had to rush to get a bus and ended up being 20 mins late to college. Like anybody cares! Boxer (Rape- The man's got THE widest collection of White shirts!) was in class and he waved me in without as much as a glance even though I missed half of the class. He sat around, talking in whispers to his minions in the front rows as I joined Rape and Addy at the last bench. 10 minutes after I parked myself, I realized the effects of my bro taking away the bike! I had promised this friend of mine who was leaving town that I'd see her before she leaves and without the bike, it was gonna be slighta difficult. Rape's lesser known brilliance kicked in and by the end of the hour, I was on addy's bike with a stolen helmet which, oddly, didn't let my glasses fit in!

As I was careful not to cross 50 on the bike, I was wondering what the helmet's owner would be thinking, till a small stone hit me rectangle on the nose, yes, the helmet lacked a Visor. The send-off was shorter than I expected it to be, so I biked back to college, 1/3 of my face layered with dust and what not, while the remaining was stuffed inside the tight helmet, behind layers of black fabric. Rape had escaped and it was Addy and Me in the last row, all alone, trying to move the bench forwards and backwards using nothing but our pinky fingers. We suddenly started reminiscing, about the out-of-place gang of friends, 8 in number, cramped into the last benches from day 1. How we started talking to each other, how we spent countless hours bunking, how we lazed off even more hours at juice shop/bajji kadai, how we lied at home to stay at a friend's place in the night and how Golti J's addiction to beer was disturbing!

Rape A.k.A Rakesh Ramani - Best friend of the lot, partner in graffiti art on table and how can i forget his women-repelling powers? Dumb C Teamie.

Golti J A.k.A Jagan Passapalatte ( I kid you not!) - Clown, Bangalore addict and the child. Dumb C Teamie.

Beer Belly A.k.A Chandramouli P.S - Exaggeratus maximus, aspiring theatre artist and Brand whore!

Maanamkettavan A.k.A Arvind Sairam - The great man who cleared 16 arrears in a single sitting, Clown II, man with strangely addictive hand gimmicks.

Golti A A.k.A Aditya Kouda - Guitarist, the ego guy and the man who's had 3 different hairstyles throughout college!

Barath A.k.A Barath - The guy in the long term relationship, Rich kid and abnormally tempered.

Proxy A.k.A Haribaskar - Proxy man, Good guy while entering college, transformed into more than just a metal head by Golti A.

Srivatsan A.k.A Srivatsan Hari - Nerd, Computer Guy and the dude who earns in $.

I'm gonna miss these guys a lot, the rest, not so much. Had these guys not been there for me, preventing me from turning into one of those stereotypical Vivekananda College Boys, I would've been one huge ass! (Bigger than now)

So thank you men, it was an honour bunking classes and eating food at strange hours with you. There are certain things that are unmentionable here that I am thankful for too, you know what I mean.

But frankly, the only good thing about my college was how they let me participate in all those Culturals all through the 3 years. If not for that, I would've stayed in college more and probably been semi-transformed. I've met tons of people at these culturals and they are a good gang of folks who deserve more than just a mention, will write on them laters. The Cherry on my 3 years of labour was Grandslam '09. I still can't figure out how we managed to conduct a small but cash-rich culturals in just 12 days! True Story!! Thanks to every one of those volunteers, fellow organisers and just everybody who were a part of it, you just gave some purpose to the 3 years that I spent in the rotten hell hole.

If I've not killed myself by now, you know it's because of those fellow last benchers. I've received nothing from the college, absolutely nothing. Insipid professors who scold me in front of a packed crowd for not creating a scene, the folks from the other depts who were banging their heads trying to figure out stuff that are beyond their comprehension, those 4 fat guys who spent every single day inside the BBA dept looking at MTV Roadies on the free internet with the HOD sitting next to them asking them to click on the girl's face!

I am definitely going to miss my last bench mates and I'm hoping I can say the same things, if not better, about the next set of people I am going to meet in my life's next chapter. Which may be either a Year at a Mass Communication college outside city or 3 years at Ford.

I raise a toast, to my co-conspirators, for good times gentlemen, good times... You've made these 3 years less of a struggle..

Untitled..

"Nothing's gonna change my world"

John Lennon

Nothing and nobody's gonna change my world. It's how I will be, how I am going to be and how I always have been. And I'm happy that way. I do Not let many people alter the way I look at things and there shall be no exception. I do Not let people close enough to affect my bubble and I am really happy that way, thank you very much!

Lonely Hearts Club Band..

Loneliness. Man is a Social animal and he is NOT supposed to be alone. Friends make a lot of difference, but there's always this certain gap that only one person can fill. And when it comes to me, I've got a saturation point. There're only some things my friends can give me and who am I to demand more from them? Being friends with them isn't a license to let my whims run riot!

Worst feeling ever? Not being hung by your thumb (though I've never tried that). It is feeling lonely, feeling lonely even when you are surrounded by people who go that extra mile to keep you happy. Feeling lonely, inspite of being amidst those very same people you run to when you have a problem. I guess that's hypocritical too. But right now, modest though I try to be, I am lonely.

Taake the 25!!

Too many things have happened in this past week.

Anna University's shit excuse for Culturals a.k.a Techofes. No cash/certificates for 3rd places. What crap man? Honestly, why would anyone even bother conducting events if they're gonna be giving just 300 and 150 bucks as cash "prizes"? That doesn't even cover the regn and the food costs there!!

While returning from Rakesh's place with Golti J, we saw this man having a seizure in one of the streets behind Raintree. I helped him while Golti called the ambulance. I've gotta say I was seriously impressed by their service. Exactly 1 minute after he called for the Ambulance, the new 108 service, the Nurse in the Ambulance called him and asked for directions from where they were. I don't know if it was the traffic or if they were just lost, but they took around 9-10 minutes to get to the spot, which is pretty late, especially in case of a seizure patient. Soon as they came, the Nurse whipped out a pair of Rubber Gloves (which, she later responsibly thrashed into the Dust Bin), she checked the man's vitals (The man had stopped seizing and he'd taken a tablet by the time the Ambulance arrived). I've seen enough Medical Sitcoms to know what they were saying. The man's state sounded normal to me and It was backed up by the Doctor who the Nurse talked to. But what really caught my eyes was the Ambulance as such. It was very well equipped. It had enough room to hold 3 patients and the Nurse had Digital Equipments for checking BP and Pulse. Not that ancient pumping thing which would fart afterwards. If there's something Yellow Shawl's govt has done this time, apart from the usual flyovers drama, it's Gotta be this service. Unbelievably smooth!!

You can never ever find me cribbing about someone or bullshitting about someone. But this time it's beyond me. Such a thing hasn't been organised in my coll since its inauguration. 60 yrs, we've never had an inter dept cults. Now the BBA Dept idiots hold such a huge thing. They dont even tell me that its happening!! I'm my dept's cul sec for crying out loud!! Leave me. The whole coll has no idea that they've been working on such a thing. Except for the management and the bba hod, who is one whole other story. My hod says this as a matter of fact thing. I knew about it only when they called me to moderate jam!! If not for that, I would've been shocked on that day. Like come on, If they'd said one word to me, I would've made sure my dept was roped in and we could've made it a heck a lot bigger. They just want all the glory to themselves. I'm totally flabbergasted and they're just going way beyond any line.

Post-Dinner whining sessions Rock!! Especially if you are whining to a girl who can relate to it! Thank you Rishma :)

My College has been conducting Department sports this past week. Cricket got over today and Badminton starts on Monday. I was never a good cricketer and I can never become one. I'm decent, I'm this run of the mill guy playing street cricket once in a while to keep his body in shape. I was not picked for the first match, fine by me, the team's got 15 ppl and someone has to sit and cheer the boys. We won the 1st match comfortably. The 2nd match was yesterday and I was picked in the 11. I didn't get a chance to bat though. When it was our turn to field, I was fielding in the deep, usually where I field even in street cricket. 1 run out, 1 catch in the covers and 1 dropped catch at Mid On later, we won the match. I have to tell you that I was utterly dismayed when the captain didn't pick me today. Everybody drops catches. Even the captain missed an easy run out. The run out I assisted in was at a crucial time and the catch that I took shaped the whole over in which they lost 3 wickets. I was sure I'd be picked. And after looking at the way my replacement was used, I was sure the Captain had lost his mind. He'd picked the other guy because he can bowl better than me. But he crapped on field today, misfielded many times and he wasn't even given an over. Shit happens!! C'est La Vie!

Anyways, I don't know why, But I guess I've been whining overtly for a long time now. I miss people. People who I kept close and who've betrayed me by their actions. No more whining for now.

Saarang Night..

I know all's been said and tons of people have posted things about their Nights at Saarang 2009. The writer's block's been very pushy and I had to post something to keep my blog alive.. so here goes..

The Night is pretty memorable.. Staying up.. The OAT.. The Singing.. The time with those people.. The Cold.. That Life warming smoke.. Drooling at Opeth's Kit.. Promised food and fooled by a kid (:P).. The card games at 3 am.. Slipping into the toilet for some smelly warmth.. The Simpsons T-Shirt.. The sadness about not being able to do anything to keep that girl warm.. Great times..

Running a Marathon

Yes. I'm gonna be running a Marathon this sunday. Not a whole marathon, I haven't got the practice for that. I'll be running in the 10km mini marathon along with Golti J and Free.

I don't know why I am running (probably cuz I said I would to Golti when I was yet to wake up fully) but I am running.

So if I die after/during/before the marathon, this will be my last post. And if I make it to the finish line still standing, then I'll definitely blog about it.

Blocked!

My mind has been blocked from producing anything that is worth reading. Yes. Writer's Block...

Sugarplum Fairy

Endless sweating
Awake for more time than I sleep, resulting in revisiting my worst nightmares
Wierd, really really wierd Dreams
"You never listen to people" speeches
*where is that darn pampering that people keep talking about??*
Plans gone for a toss
Sick food

On the bright side,

more and more boredom
Endless hours spent listening to music
people don't bother me


Things that happen when I suffer from a fever, which I am doing right now :|

Chennai Sangamam 2009

My Dad woke me up saying "we are going to the Chennai Sangamam fest at Venkatnarayana Road at 8pm, be ready" *information overload*.

After a while, I realized what he said but I still can't figure out why he said that at 9 in the morning. Anyways, when the clock struck 8, we were out of the house. We = Dad, Mom, Sister and I, my brother was supposed to meet us there, but he chickened out in the last minute saying he was too tired after work (seeing that his company has gone bust, saying that he had work was a bit fishy!).

I had no idea how it was going to be until I reached the spot. It was unbelievably crowded and the sights, sounds, smell and the food were awesome. Such a wide variety of folklore in our state. The people who were performing looked happy. I'm not sure if they thought the turnout would be this big.

I managed to take some photos, but most are shaky and it was on my sister's phone.

WCC Cults!

That's one culfest I won't be attending the next year. I'm glad I ended it on a high though. 3rd in Music Quiz along with Rape and Addy and 1st in JAM. It was good fun for both the days. The free lemonade was good and had a fun time overall. The most fun was the last few hours of the last day.

I had just won JAM and collected my money (only 300, those idiots) and I was really really hungry. The sandwich shop guy was generous enough to knock off 10 bucks if I bought 2 sandwiches, the chocolate shop girl gave me a free chocolate when I bought 2. Loaded with a couple of sandwiches and 3 chocolates, I marched towards the stage where the Western Dance comp was going on, along with some friends. Somehow, they moved on to see their college's dance performance and I was standing alone with food in my hands! I wanted some company and I moved on to find Ben and his girlfriend and disturbed them till the dance was over (an hour atleast). But before I could finish even one of the sandwiches, some minions from Loyola came in and before I blinked thrice, the plate was off my hands!! Thankfully, I had stashed the chocolates in my pant pocket and ate them along with the love couple.

After the dance, the results and the overall trophy was presented, The WCC ppl literally forced us off their campus. But since it was my last yr there, I wanted to make a mark. Loyola won the overalls and "we are the champions" was played over the PA. Ben, Khushi, Rishma, Anusha, Shruthi and I immediately burst into singing the song at the top of our voices till we reached the exit gate (a good ten mins walk). The stares, cheers and jeers that we got are still ringing in my ears.

Good fun, good fun. :D

Early Morning Blues...

IMS Prof: When in a GD, you should use sentences like "I would like to say, I would like to add..." (a few more examples). Now, use any of the above sentences and frame a sentence. Anything.

Me: I would like to say that expecting people to come up with sentences at 645 am is nothing short of a crime.

Prof: *blink blink*

2009?

Alright, to be honest, 08 went past me pretty fast. Even though I had moments when I questioned some of my thoughts, actions and almost everything, there were times I can't even remember. The other day, I saw someone I knew and I waved at her, I still can't remember who she is!!

2009 started off with me feeling kinda bad about my "Future". CAT failed big time and I don't know what I am gonna do. I don't wna work and I certainly want to get out of home, live on my own and discover myself.

To all those people I hurt/disappointed/pissed off, sorry, again, I hope I don't top that list this year.

To all those people I made happy/satisfied/laugh, well, I'll try my best to keep on doing it.